With Blackened Rose making a return to stage with Chapter 2 this Thursday 16 Oct (SO EXCITED!!), I think now is the right time to talk about how I overcame obstacles when I organised a particular photoshoot.
Context: one of the songs which I have deeply resonated with and inspired by in relation to one of my personal photoshoot concepts is “Requiem Of The Rose” by Blackened Rose. The goal of the photoshoot was to tell a story called “Rose’s Eulogy” inspired by the actual song.
To start off with, I listened to Requiem Of The Rose when it was released on 30 November 2023. Fast forward to the date 11 Dec 2023. While I took a break from working on photos from a gig for a client, I planned out my mood board whilst listening to the song on repeat. This is where the concept was born.
This was where I got in touch with a friend of mine who’s a singer/dancer. She was the very first person I envisioned when I visualised the song in my head. Her vocal performance back in May 2022 played a critical role in the creation of the concept. Being patient was critical as she had a very busy and tight schedule. Once we had initially confirmed the date, I prematurely went full steam ahead with the planning – location, the rose prop, a recital program and a wand/tiara from Sydney Morning Glory.
Dec 16 to Jan 2 was admittedly a premature time to listen to Requiem Of The Rose as the model and I had the initial date and time locked in. From there, I’ve had restless nights listening to the song and also prematurely drafting my captions for the story synopsis across each part, including the possible BTS process. The story itself is about a young Princess who waits for her long awaited Prince Charming to return as she tenderly looks at the rose he gave her as a parting gift.
Jan 3 to Feb 28 would be a dark time for me. I admittedly regret checking my phone in the early morning to find that she has kindly pulled out just after I sent her the call sheet. I felt very demoralized and defeated throughout the day. It has hard to process in words, which mentally affected me. I also felt something painful on my knees. That was when I stopped listening to the song for a while to prevent the mental scar from resurfacing.
To further add, Blackened Rose’s Lazybones gig would happen a week later. When they performed Requiem Of The Rose, I felt internal pain throughout the 6 minutes they performed. In fact, it took me all the guts to hide my bitter feelings inside. To counteract with this, I decided to film them performing the song.
It also took me all the guts to not think about her as the vision of her holding the rose from her performance from 4/5/2022 seared my mind.
Sometime after their performance, and once I overcame my initial bitterness, I shelved the concept until a month later, where I got in touch with another friend of mine who’s a singer. After she too kindly turned down the shoot, I shelved it again until I can find someone. That was when I considered abandoning the concept if I could not find a model within a week or so
During this timeframe, I thought: is it going to be this challenging organising photoshoots like this? This has been the most hectic I’ve been through; holding back all my raw feelings and staying professionally composed throughout the entire ordeal. At the same time, not thinking too much about what I initially envisioned.
February 28 2024 afternoon arrived; while I figured out my next steps with the concept, a Brisbane based model (pictured above), who’s connected with a model I’ve worked with, posted on her IG story that she’ll be in Sydney and she’s accepting bookings. I immediately jumped on the opportunity. Shortly after locking in the date and time, I took the concept out of shelving, and dedicated the next 72 endless hours refining the concept and listening to Requiem Of The Rose again with renewed hope and confidence while at the same time, hiding the internal pain I’ve endured for almost 2 months.
From there, I was severely determined to complete this concept, and I got my answer.
To summarise, I tackled this photoshoot by paying closer attention to both the music and lyrics. I was heavily attentive of the music as it is melancholic in mood and emotional in feeling. The lyrics portray a narrative of lost love which I aimed for with the model and the rose prop which I painted black with permanent marker.
My experience overall with this concept was very hectic mainly as the song was consuming my mental state of mind and physical determination to complete it for each obstacle I encountered. It had admittedly been very challenging in the pre-planning stages as there were varying key factors which played a role in increasing my determination to complete it. Once I had the concept down and the photoshoot was complete, I felt I can now finally listen to Requiem Of The Rose in peace without getting anxiety or panic attacks.
Sharing 4 things I’ve learnt from this photoshoot:
1) Don’t rely on your initial instincts with visualising the very first person you have in mind in frame. Be prepared to have a backup plan if a pullout occurs
2) If the song you’re inspired by is from preferably a local band you really like, go see their shows more often.
3) If the song is consuming you too much in a painful way, I’d recommend shelving it until you’re really confident you can visually proceed ahead
4) Avoid putting the song inspiration on repeat until you’ve completed the photoshoot
